It took three years of careful study and field testing, but I appear to have finally mastered The Look. Not the look that strikes fear into the heart of children, no, The Look… the one what heralds the worst thing in the world… Thine Mother’s Disappointment.

Mom used Scary Look! It’s super effective!!

CAPITALISM NEWS: I designed a new mug! Check it out: Jupiter’s Greatest Mom. When you finally realize perfection on Earth is unattainable, remember: reach for the stars! There’s less competition and the standards are lower out there.