How Baby

Hey, remember when all How Baby comics were colored like this? It looks better now that I know how to draw better too. 😀

I wish the world worked in such a way that the culture around new motherhood would slowly grope towards being better, but if anything it only seems like the badness is speeding up, much like in other parts of the internet. Sometimes it’s good to get a reminder of a few very important things:

1. Very few things you do will mess up your children permanently
2. One of those things is failing to take care of yourself, so that your ability to care for them and be present for them suffers
3. Despite #2, mothers are unfairly expected to sacrifice their time, health, careers, and sanity for their children.
4. Being a good parent is not the same as being a perfect parent, because being a good parent is actually possible

Life is a series of compromises, and that includes parenthood. It’s okay – downright mandatory – to put your children first, but taking care of yourself is putting them first, because they deserve a mom who is happy, healthy, and engaged. You can’t white-knuckle eighteen years and then crumble into dust. You gotta put on Bluey, you gotta find time for joy, you gotta ask for help, so you can be strong enough to make it the rest of the way.

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Small housekeeping note: I’m so sorry if anyone was looking for me at Akimatsuri (or a HB) last week; our dog Juno unfortunately needed another surgery to remove some cancerous growths, and they found a lot more than they were expecting when she was under, so we needed to stay home to observe and care for her. Sorry it’s bad news!!

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TRANSCRIPT

(Radial panel layout picturing mothers doing various self care/making compromises of being a ‘perfect mom’, reading:)
You’re still a good mom if you: outsource help, use the TV as a babysitter sometimes, take care of you first, take meds, feed them what they will eat, have hobbies.