Y’know, it was surprisingly difficult to come up with something I’d never say that wasn’t, like, cartoonishly hateful. I guess I’m just real agreeable? Hit me up with your weird parenting hells, chances are I’ll be like ‘yeah, I been there.’

Couldn’t let the fact that this one’s going up actually on April 1 pass me by. Rest assured, I have not been replaced by a pod person and am very much still on Team Nature Usually Tries to Kill Us.

(PS., yes, you should read ‘females’ in a Ferengi voice for maximum fidelity)